You Might Be a Terrorist If ...

Posted by JD 02/09/2012 at 08:00

Don’t you just love reading about governments making stupid assumptions about people? No? Me neither.

It seems many people may be terrorists by doing things that are

  • perfectly legal
  • required due to other stupid government laws
  • necessary to ensure privacy

Here’s the news article to provide some background on the FBI and DoJ thoughts.

Typical Terrorist Behaviors

Here’s a short list:

  • Overly concerned about privacy – gee, all my white-hat friends fall into this group.
  • traveling illogical distances to visit an internet cafe – sometimes I like to walk or the local cafe doesn’t seem trustworthy.
  • Use multiple cell phones – gee, thank the IRS for this. business/personal.
  • Switch SIM cards in the same handset – thank the telcoms for sucky pricing for this, especially if you call overseas.
  • mask your IP address – gee, I want everything I do online to be traced back to my home or business network – sure, that’s smart.
  • schedule file downloads – gee, I’d prefer that large files (say Linux distros) get downloaded when the network isn’t so busy – like over night, but I also download TV schedules overnight and other small things too, like the weather forecast automatically, overnight too.
  • making suspicious VoIP calls or talks over internet games. Since I only use VoIP, I guess every call I make is suspicious ?
  • uses data encryption
  • download the Anarchist Cookbook – gee, I grabbed a copy out of curiosity in the 1990s. Am I a sleeper?
  • Interest in electronics, timers, remote transmitters / receivers.
  • Taking photographs of transportation or seeking diagrams. Gee – before I travel to a new city, I try to get maps and public transportation information. I also really like big structures – trains, train stations, airports, airplanes, cool buildings and other architecture features. I took hundreds of architecture and structure photos in my travels, maybe thousands. Human creations are really cool, aren’t they?

There’s Good News – You Can Report These Behaviors!!!

  • Gather information, but don’t let the suspect know
  • Log license plates, vehicles, names and spoken languages
  • Don’t search the content or their electronic communications. I guess they don’t want it thrown out of court or get you into trouble by breaking federal wiretap laws. Good to know they are interested in YOU not breaking any laws. Nice.

Do I Need to Report Myself or All My Neighbors?

I’d like to help the authorities, but everything they’ve outlined above seem like pretty normal behaviors to me. Some of my neighbors have ties overseas and use VoIP to call home a few times a week. I call all over the place using VoIP or Skype myself. I have friends all around the world and talking keeps us connected.

I have 2 different cell phones too. See the IRS makes it difficult to use a single handset for work and personal calling – at least legally. I also would prefer for my employer NOT to know my personal business, so having a burner phone is common for people like me. I have a burner phone that was paid for in cash and I use cash to buy more minutes. OTOH, I’ve been using that same phone for over 5, perhaps 6 years. I also have a work-provided smartphone.

I haven’t used an internet cafe in about 4 years. There is enough free wifi available and I know how to use a VPN to make it safe. If I really want to be relatively anonymous, I’d spoof my MAC address and sit outside a quick-oil-change shop and borrow their free wifi access to do nasty things.

I’m trying to learn multiple foreign languages. Sometimes I watch foreign films and sometimes I practice over the internet with native speakers. Is that suspicious too?

Just because I know and care about internet privacy, doesn’t make me a terrorist. As long as my behaviors aren’t illegal, then my government has no business in my affairs, especially without a warrant signed by a court.

The last sentence says:

It is important to remember that just because someone’s speech,
actions, beliefs, appearance, or way of life is different; it does not
mean that he or she is suspicious.

Finally, some sanity. Almost every one of my nerd friends fit this profile.

You might be a witch if you use an umbrella.

Terrorist also eat and drink, so we need to watch out for people eating and drinking.

This terror hunt has been ludicrous for years, but it isn’t getting any better. I’d hoped the government would get tired of spying on everyone, but they seem to like the power too much. The government is afraid and scared people are dangerous. The only way we can stop them is to cut off their funding.

To learn more, check out this PDF brochure This must be the source.

Remember when you actually had to do something illegal before you were investigated?